Black Cat Mojo

In these three novellas of blackly comic crime and creature horror, you'll go slumming with well-endowed dwarf porn stars, killer badgers, redneck mama's boys, morbidly obese nymphomaniacs, dumbass dog-nappers, trailer trash Jesus freaks, diarrheic Jack Russell terriers, not-so-wiseguys, mob-movie memorabilia collectors, junkie blackmailers, and giant man-eating Burmese pythons. OF BADGERS & PORN DWARFS To pay back a gambling debt and avoid being castrated, washed-up dwarf porn star Rummy Rumsfeld (of Snow White spoof Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Up Your Ass We Go) must overcome a geriatric pederast, redneck pornographers, a morbidly obese nymphomaniac with serious personal hygiene issues, the ghost of his religious zealot mother, a dwarf-eating badger, and George Lucas. JESUS IN A DOG'S ASS Dumbass desperadoes Hootie and Poke incur the wrath of a trailer trash church group, not to mention God, when they kidnap a Jack Russell Terrier with the figure of Jesus Christ in its butt. FRANK, THE SNAKE, & THE SNAKE After testifying against notorious mob boss "Snake" Cobretti, embittered ex-wiseguy Frankie "The Tin Man" Piscopo emerges from Witness Protection to embark on a disastrous drug deal that leaves him fighting for his life against a giant Burmese python with a taste for Italian-American. BONUS SHORT STORY THE MAD BUTCHER OF PLAINFIELD'S CHARIOT OF DEATH Washed up carny buys Ed Gein's car hoping to reverse his bad luck. . . but the real horror was just getting revved up . . . "It's almost as if someone smashed Dashiell Hammett's seamless noir patter, Elmore Leonard's pitch-perfect ear for hapless characters, Quentin Tarantino's sardonic sense of irony and Clive Barker's unflinching portrayal of sexual pain/pleasure into a blender, mixing in a heaping helping of Stephen King's pop culture mise-en-scene framing. Howe bobs and weaves, pulling it all together in a denouement that is as satisfying as it is completely unexpected." -Walt Hicks for Hellnotes "Gloriously offensive, fast-paced and funny, only the animals come through with their dignity almost intact, although Howe does betray some affection for his cast of dead-enders in each selection. So if you're tired of all that respectable, snooze-worthy shit with silhouettes on the cover, try something like this, a book best consumed on the subway in a paper bag, or at the zoo." -David James Keaton, author of The Last Projector and Fish Bites Cop! "Utterly compelling, uniquely twisted, and funny as hell, Black Cat Mojo is simply magnificent!" -Adam Millard, author of Vinyl Destination and Hamsterdamned! "Black Cat Mojo makes you feel like you've stumbled across a treasure trove filled with the stories Tarantino was too afraid to tell. Bizarro pulp of high quality, Adam Howe writes like Chandler on mescaline-a mind altering read." -S.R. Mastrantone, Shock Totem, Lamplight, Vignettes from the End of the World "Adam Howe's stories are peopled with characters you might find in a Carl Hiaasen novel: wac...